Dr. Lilac's Chateau

Hilarious!

2011-03-14T10:37:00.002-05:00

The first time I watched this video I had tears rolling down my cheeks! Never laughed this hard in years...ENJOY :)

MATCH DAY 2011

2011-03-14T10:33:00.000-05:00

OMG! Today is the Match day for 2011. Around this time last year I was at work checking my email every 10 min. This is sooo nostalgic!

Good luck to those who are in the game!!!! :)

BLIZZARD

2011-02-02T12:37:00.003-06:00

A snowstorm hit Chicago yesterday until this morning and I was on call. It was actually a good thing coz I did not want to be stuck in the middle of the road covered in snow. Plus I THOUGHT I would get some sleep since of course nobody would wanna leave their house in this kind of weather, right? Wrong! I capped at midnight admitting 5 patients. But after that it was catching some Zzzzzz's in the call room.

Taken from the window of my call room.

The next day on my way home the streets were almost completely devoid of cars. People are trying to shovel the snow so they can get their car out coz the snow is literally knee-high! My biggest challenge was finding a parking spot in the street. But luckily I did. And thank God for SUVs otherwise I would be stuck trying to get into the spot.

Can you even see anything???

A blissful month

2011-01-15T16:01:00.001-06:00

I was on leave for a month. Being with my baby 24/7 was a bliss! :) And the best part of all, she was an easy baby to take care of. She would only cry when hungry and tired. She wouldn't even care if she had a dirty diaper.

Me, on the other hand, was limping for the first week post partum because of symphysis pubic dysfunstion. So it was a bit frustrating when I couldn't move too fast to attend to the baby. But that is just a tiny sacrifice. At least I didn't have any major complications.

The baby had no problem sleeping at night. She did not confuse day from night. She initially fed every 2 hours and gradually stretched to 3 hours. She absolutely LOVES to stretch! And when she does she makes this funny groan like she was a grown MAN! ;) She looks more like daddy and that doesn't bother me at all. However, most people think that it does coz when they comment on that they apologize and give me that look of pity like it's the most devastating thing in the world for your child not to look like you! Seriously?! But I'm still hopeful she would turn into mini-me when she grows up ;) She was growing up fast! She was born 6 lbs 15 oz and on her 4th week appointment she weighed 10 lbs and 8 oz! Her newborn clothes only fit until her 2nd week and she started wearing 3-month size clothes. Well, she's tall for one. I think it's the length more than the width. Nah! Who am I kidding? This kid is chubby! :)

It was getting emotional towards the end of my leave. I would cry thinking of leaving my baby. Heck I would cry watching a child with the mother on TV. I was seriously thinking of extending my leave for another month but then it would mean that I would have to extend my training. Hubby was totally against it. I didn't care. And there was the issue of child care. My mother was supposed to come and help out but for some reason she had a strict immigration officer during the interview and she was denied for a tourist visa :( She was so devastated :( It's her first grandchild and she's being denied to see her. How cruel is that?! Anyway, we found a great babysitter.

That month came and gone like the wind. It's time to go back to work...sigh...

Natal Day

2010-12-15T15:59:00.004-06:00

On December 13, 2010 at 2:11 PM my baby girl was born :)

First sign

2010-12-10T15:19:00.002-06:00

It was a Friday and I was on call. At 6 pm I went to the bathroom and saw some spotting. No big deal. I was a spotter. I didn't feel anything else but deep inside I knew something was cooking in there. I silently jumped for joy realizing that I will be meeting my little princess very soon. I went about my business. That night was a bit busy. I had admission left and right but was thankful that I would be capping early and so I would be able to get some sleep. At around 9PM after I admitted my 3rd patient I went to the bathroom again and saw anothe spot- bigger this time. Still no contractions but I didn mention this to my senior and he kinda freaked out saying I should be going to L&D right now. I just laughed at him.

I admitted my last patient (5 is the max) at midnight and decided if I was still spotting to get myself checked at L&D. Yep. Still spotting. I told my senior I was going to L&D just to be checked but I would still answer any pages. I texted my hubby as I was going in the elevator to L&D. Once at L&D, the nurse brought me to a room and gave me a hospital gown. Wait a minute. I just want my cervix checked. Can't someone just do it real quick??? Nope. I have to be admitted for observation since I was already term. Jeez. Ok. Fine.

I went and changed and laid down on the bed. The nurse hooked me on to the monitor to see if I was contracting. I was but not strong and not consistent. I was there for about 30 min until the OB resident came in and asked me more questions. Finally she checked my cervix. 1.5 cm. No big deal since I'm a primi. I knew it'll still take a while. So I was discharged and given instructions to come back once I get PAINFUL contractions that come in every 5 min. Phew! At least I won't be going into labor tonight. I kept checking my pager and prayed that there won't be any code or issues on the floor I was being "observed."

I slowly went to my callroom and got a snooze....

8 months and counting

2010-11-10T17:10:00.000-06:00

WOW! I'm already 34 weeks today. Time flies soooo fast. I still remember the conversation I had with my husband about adopting, thinking that I would never have the priviledge of carrying my own child. Now in a matter of 4-6 weeks I'll be holding her in my arms. It's still overwhelming sometimes to think about the miracle we have received from God. Sometimes I still can't believe it's happening. But it is. And right now, I feel like the luckiest girl alive :)

Gestational update

2010-10-28T17:15:00.001-05:00

I'm currently 32 weeks pregnant. It has been a smooth pregnancy so far. No GDM, no pre-ecplampsia, just the usual back aches, round ligament pains, annoying Braxton Hicks and the frequent elbowing and kicking from the growing peanut. By the way peanut is a SHE :)

Yesterday my hubby and I went for our last ultrasound. I did not expect to hear the words 4.7 lbs from the tech! I thought she'd be small or at least average in size but 4.7 lbs at 32 weeks seems like a giant to me. People kept saying how small I was and that I should eat some more. Oh well... Last week when I weighed myself at my prenatal visit I have gained 23 lbs. Looks like I'm on the right track in terms of gaining. Of course some of the weight went to my thighs and hips- totally unavoidable! But I'm happy I'm not gaining weight uncontrollably.

Tomorrow will be my first baby shower. It's being hosted by the medical director of the surgical center I used to work at. I can't wait to see old friends again! Some of the gifts have already arrived. When I came home today there 3 big boxes waiting by the front door. Can't wait for hubby to come home tonight so we can open the boxes together ;)

I have been so blessed with this pregnancy. I have not been plagued by fatigue despite my 5-6 calls/month. It has been very tolerable so far. Co-residents are amazed by how much stamina I have! I am too :-O

Thank you Lord for all your blessings :)

Taken at 22 weeks

ICU Rotation

2010-10-21T14:58:00.001-05:00

I just got done with my ICU rotation. Despite being on call every 3 days I thoroughly enjoyed it. Did I learn a lot? Maybe...But learning is really hard to gauge. What I really learned most is to make sure that critical patients have some sort of advance directives. Otherwise the Ethics Team will hound you till you get one. I had some patients who did not have a family at all to help them make any sort of decision and are now unable to decide for themselves. So we go about in applying for a gurdianship with the state which can take 1 month or so for processing. In the meantime, these patients are under the wise and discreet care of their residents and attendings.

Some families do not know how to let go of their obviously dying relative. Seriosuly, I had patients who were in and out of the unit, with a trach and PEG in place, lying like a rotting vegetable, clearly suffering, yet families do not want to pull the plug. "This is America! Do what we pay you to do!" I think that's what these people are thinking. Oblivious of the fact that medicine can just do so much and sometimes you just gotta let nature take its course.

I know it's hard. But personally, it's harder to see your loved-ones suffering...What do you think?

My Routine

2010-09-21T14:44:00.002-05:00

o, it's been 4 months since I started internship. So far it has been great. With my pregnancy I do consider myself very lucky as I do not have the complaints of most pregnant women. My stamina is the same, my appetite is the same (although my sweet tooth is bacn and I do crave a cookie after dinner), and my personality is as preppy as ever :) Although I do have the occasional back pain- esp when I sit for more than 30 minutes.

Calls have been tolerable. We do calls 5-6 times in a month. That's pretty good compared to other programs.

This month I am rotating in one of the floors. The schedule is pretty much routine in a daily basis:
7:00-8:00AM: Morning Report
8:00-9:00: Occasional lectures
8:00-11:00: If no lecture then patient care
11:00-12:00PM- Teaching rounds
12:00-1:00: Noon Conference (while eating lunch)
1:00-4:00:Patient care

Yup. We are done at 4PM if not on call. If we are oncall then we stay until 12N the next day. It's pretty laid back compared to what I was used to during med school. Not that I'm complaining ;) We do get to eat breakfast after morning report and it is a good way of bonding with co-residents. I love my batch. I think we all get along pretty well. I don't see anybody giving potential problems....Hope I'm right :)

It's kicking! :)

2010-07-23T15:23:00.003-05:00

I just turned 18 weeks yesterday but starting 17 weeks I started feeling tiny pokes on my lower abdomen. I was like, "Wow! I'm disgustingly very gassy today!" Then I realized that it could be the baby letting me know it's growing ;) Now, I constantly feel its movements all throughout the day- when it's awake of course. When I'm on call it likes to keep me company :) How sweet of my little baby.

In 2 weeks I'll be finding out the sex! Can't wait :)

I miss bedside care :(

2010-07-19T15:14:00.000-05:00

During my training back home I spent way too much time with patients that it made me sick. We were the ones doing EVERYTHING from drawing blood to taking specimens to the labs or taking patients to radiology. Now that I am in a new world where technology is so much more advanced and staffing is so much more adequate I spend more time on the computer writing progress notes, checking lab results and typing orders. I've only been here 3 weeks and I can truly see the huge difference in clinical exposure. I have to admit I do learn more now that there are teaching rounds with attending physicians than back home since back there work was more physical. But I do want to interact more with my patients and just learn about them in general. I love connecting with patients. 2 have already pledged to be my patients when I graduate. I guess technology does make one lazy. Gone are the days where diagoses are solely done clinically. Also with the rise of lawsuits doctors are now more cautious in their patient care that they tend to practice defensive medicine. "We need to order such and such just to be sure we rule out everything." I don't blame them. I would do the same thing.

On call

2010-06-30T12:20:00.000-05:00

My first call experience was not bad at all. I only had 2 admissions. But was I able to sleep? Not really. I don't sleep well in a new environment. Plus I kept checking my pager making sure I didn't miss a page. Yup! Paranoid me as usual.

The call rooms

It was my first time to enter the call suite. It was so eeriely quiet. I guess everybody is busy on the floors. Each on call intern and resident has his/her own room with an adjoining bathroom. Pretty convenient but would I really get a chance to take a shower after my shift? I HOPE SO!

My first week

2010-06-25T16:31:00.010-05:00

I haven't really been excited about the start of my residency until about 3 days before my orientation. I guess it really hasn't sunk in yet and now it's just a few days away and my adrenaline then started to flow.

I got my stuff ready for my new job. Well, there's nothing really a whole lot to prepare. I got my stet, good quality pens, 2 comfortable pairs of shoes, 2 pairs of maternity pants (which I wouldn't probably start wearing until I'm mid 2nd tri), a small notebook to jot down some important info, a binder for my patient list, etc. My lab coats and pager will be provided for. Ok...I'm, ready! :)

First day of orienation was our ACLS class. I have already been certified but I decided to take the class again since I didn't really learn a whole lot from my recertification class last year. It was fun and I got to meet most of my co-interns (3 of them got delayed due to visa issues). Next day was our pre-employment screening, distribution of benefits packages and computer training. Benefits are great! Residents are 100% covered and if I choose to give birth at the hospital my bills will be fully covered- except for the professional fee which I will need to pay 20% of. Not bad! Then at the end of the orientation we got our lab coats, pagers, badges and locker keys. Yeah!

First day of official training went by really fast. My first rotation was in CCU (Coronary Care Unit). I had a resident with me at all times. Going through the Electronic Medical Records (EMR) was a breeze but getting to know all our patients took a bit more time due to their conditions but on the 3rd day I got the hang of it and started doing my own rounds ahead of the resident ;)

I'm actually glad I got the tough rotation first. In that way when I rotate in the wards it would be a piece of cake :)....Hopefully....

Farewell Not Goodbye

2010-06-17T15:48:00.000-05:00

Our lives are made up of different chapters. And in each chapter We meet a group of people who have made an impact in our lives. My life has been decorated by beautiful relationships I have made with the
characters in each chapter of my life. And now another chapter just ended.

Today was my last day at work. It seemed like a very long day. One by one I hugged each and everybody at work. Sharing tears and words of endearment. But I refuse to consider this as good-bye. My relationships with my friends will live on.

Tiffany

2010-06-15T19:15:00.003-05:00

The inevitable is here. Tomorrow will be my last day at work and I have been feeling the sadness in the air for the past week. My co-workers often give me the pouty look when we talk about my last day :( I guess this is one of the reasons why I haven't really felt the excitement of starting residency yet. My excitement was being overshadowed by my sadness of leaving my friends behind. See I don't only consider River North as a work place but also my second home. I have become good friends with everybody there and it really shows how they felt the same way about me too.

To my surprise my friends threw the "Farewell Party" today! And the culmination was a very touching gift from everybody....

One of my friends put the necklace on for me. I am not a fan of jewelry so I guess they all thought it's time for me to wear grown-up things ;) As I was saying some words of thanks and expressed how I was going to miss them terribly my voice just started to crack and before I knew it I was being hugged by everybody with tears and snot running down our faces. It was a very sentimental moment being surrounded by people who truly care about and appreciate you.

I love you all and I will always remember our time together....

My Step 3

2010-06-06T09:19:00.002-05:00

The night of June 2 I was thinking of my Step 3 result. I wasn't really sure when my score would be available but when I looked at the calendar I realized that June 3 would be the 3rd Wednesday after my exams which means my score COULD be available. The score is usually ready at midnight but I decided to just wait til the morning to check my email.

At 5:30 I woke up and my heart started pounding. What if I failed this darn exam? I thought I did well during the exam. I was calm the entire time which actually worried me a bit coz in the past a little bit of anxiety boosted my performance. This time I was very nonchalant and impatient to get this exam over with. But I felt good about my answers so that's all that matters. I did all I could and now it's all in God's hands.

So I turned on my laptop and checked the Step 3 candidate website and there it was: Print Score Report. I clicked on it and it started to download. For some reason my laptop decided to act up on that day. It was downloading the file ever sooooo slowly! But finally I saw 3 sets of figures that made my jaw drop to the floor...

I was in utter disbelief. My preparation was not as good as my previous ones. Plus I only spent 2 hours a day studying due to so many distractions like my pregnancy, residency, etc. I was even only aiming for a 75. But hey! This was a huge blessing from God and I accept it with all my heart. Thank you Lord! And I think my baby gave me good luck ;)

So how did I prepare....

My materials:

* Kaplan qbank: Not so good so I didn't finish it. Only completed 60% with a cumulative score of 65%

*USMLEWorld qbank: Very good! First round I got 64% correct and 2nd round of incorrect and marked items my score went up to 73%.

*USMLEWorld CCS: Very good! I did the interactive cases 2x and read the PDF files 2x as well.

*Master The Boards: Average. Good for quick review but felt there were incorrect concepts.

*Kaplan CK lecture notes: Only did a fast reading of IM and OB.

*Practice test on the USMLE website: 84%

The key to my preparation is my good CK knowledge and attitude. I thoroughly enjoyed studying for the exam coz I know learning all the principles will make me a better doctor. I didn't look at step 3 as just another exam, a hurdle in my path, but a way of improving myself. I learned a lot while studying and now I feel like I am ready to tackle any case in front of me ;)

Good bye USMLEs! Thank you for the challenge :)

My last hurrah!

2010-06-02T08:25:00.001-05:00

My husband and I spent the Memorial Day weekend in Florida. I considered it my last vacation before the hectic schedule begins.

It was a fun-filled trip. We stayed at my friend's house in Orlando and she was the best host ever! She pampered us everyday. Thanks Mic! :) Of course when in Orlando you can never by-pass Disney World. We didn't go to all 4 parks though as our stay was short so we decided on 2 parks instead- Epcot and Disney Hollywood Studios. It was great to feel like a kid again. Next time we visit there will be a 3rd person with us and so it would be time to see Mickey ;)

It was sad to be leaving Orlando and Mic behind. Now back to reality....

4 weeks and counting

2010-05-20T16:53:00.000-05:00

My orientation is 4 weeks away. I haven't done a single thing to prepare myself for internship. I guess I'm still giving myself a break after Step 3.

First thing I gotta do is buy those books which I will do as soon as I publish this post. Then I NEED to learn Spanish! I have been meaning to do that since last year but things have always come up. Now there won't be anymore excuses. I just bought the Rosetta Stone CD and will upload it this weekend by hook or by crook :) My co-interns and I are planning a get together before the start of our training. I'm so glad we have been communicating via Facebook ( Yup. We created a private group ;) How cool is that?!). It's soooo nice to start getting to know each other early on. I mean we'll be working closely for the next 3 years. We need to bond as early as possible :) I must say though that I really like my class :) Everybody was so supportive when I announced my pregnancy. I'm really blessed...

I have to do some modification on my wardrobe since I won't be able to squeeze a giant watermelon in my size 2 pants. I refuse to buy maternity clothes though. I will be buying those Bella Bands so I can just leave the pants unzipped without worrying about it falling to the ground. Plus it's going to be VERY cost-effective :) We are on a tight budget people! My salary will be practically nonexistent once the baby comes. Let's just hope my butt won't grow as big as my belly. Now that will be a catastrophe coz then I won't have a choice but to buy maternity clothes.

Update on the pregnancy:

Today I am exactly 9 weeks. Hubby and I went for our first OB appointment. I wasn't expecting to hear the heartbeat thru the Doppler as I am still too early but we did! I was pleasantly surprised ;) Hubby said that it sounded like the baby was running on the threadmill ;) I chose an OB from the hospital I will be training at. That will be very convenient for my prenatal visits. And when I'm on call and the water breaks all I have to do is go to my suite up on the 3rd floor ;) Yes. I have it all figured out...

Step 3 down...What's next???

2010-05-13T18:18:00.000-05:00

I just got done with the dreadful 2-day Step 3 exam. It actually wasn't too bad. I was prepared for the worst and I'm glad I conditioned myself this way. I think my secret weapon was to give myself ample breaks in between the blocks so as not to exhaust myself coz it was very exhausting.

Now comes the agony of waiting for the result...3 weeks. But I have so many things lined up to keep myself busy for the next 4 weeks.

First I have to clean the house! It's sooo dusty that I've been sneezing a lot lately :(

Next is to focus on my pregnancy 100%. I think the first few weeks I was still too scared to allow myself to get too excited coz unexpected things can happen during early pregnancy. But now I can no longer deny it. I really am pregnant and a few months from now (well 32 weeks to be exact) I will be a mommy! Oh my! I'll be a mommy!!!

My first official OB appointment will be on the 20th. And I'm so excited coz my hubby will be coming with me this time :)

Next is to get ready for my training which is really just around the corner! June 21 is the start of our orientation. I plan on buying books for references which the program will reimburse me later. That's great of them to do that. But then again they should do that ;) I'm still in the process of searching for the best book/s for internship....Any suggestions? I hear The Washington Manual of Medical Therapeutics is a good reference and The Washington Manual Internship Survival Guide is great as a guide for interns. So I think I'll start with these...

Then on Memorial Day weekend my husband and I are going to visit some friends in Florida. I guess this will be my last vacation before the hectic schedule starts...But it's a great chapter in my life that I can't wait to start....

So bring it on!

It's May already?!

2010-05-05T16:34:00.000-05:00

Wow...days come and go so fast! With everything going on in my life (getting matched, getting pregnant, taking Step 3 next week) I hardly noticed the clock ticking. I did notice tho the change in the weather! No more winter clothes for a while! :)

Step 3 review is coming along. I haven't been studying intensively as my previous preparations. I guess it's because I don't feel pressured to get a super high score anymore. I just need to pass this exam then I'll be free of the USMLEs! May 12-13 here I come! Yup, it's a 2-day exam...

As for my pregnancy...so far not a whole lot of nausea. Just small waves of queesiness here and there BUT I'm hungry ALL THE TIME! As in every 2-3 hours I have got to eat. My stomach starts churning as if I have not eaten in days! I learned how to portion my meals. I eat small snacks all throughout the day and I realized then that this is the best way to combat nausea.

Anyway, I went for a 2nd ultrasound this morning. The little bean has gotten so big in just a week! Heart reat: 147 :)

First glimpse

2010-04-29T09:07:00.000-05:00

I had my first ultrasound yesterday. I was a bit nervous. I was thinking: "What if there's nothing in there?!" I guess part of me was still in disbelief of this awesome miracle.

But then I saw the little bean with its heart flickering. It was an awesome feeling :)

I informed my program of this life-changing event and I'm so happy that everybody was very supportive. The last thing I wanted to do was screw up the rotations. But I was reassured by the chief residents that there will be no problems at all and that there will be more than enough coverage. I'm really lucky to be in a big program.

My step 3 is in 2 weeks and I'm sooo relaxed and so ready to get rid of the USMLEs!

Letting go...

2010-04-18T12:15:00.002-05:00

I am a self-proclaimed control freak. Everything must and should be according to my plan. I don't know where I got this attitude from. All I know is that I've been like this since I was 6 years old.

My life experiences these past 3 years have been a roller coaster ride but most of all, it has been an eye-opener and a form of self-discovery. I can no longer deny it: I AM NOT IN COTROL. God is the captain and He turns the wheel. I simple must let go and let Him take me wherever He wants. I must trust in Him.

As soon as I realized this great revelation, things started to unfold and all my dreams are slowly coming true. I got matched into a great program and now I am expecting a miracle baby....God is good. With Him everything and anything is possible :)

Yup..It's POSITIVE!

2010-04-17T18:08:00.015-05:00

My husband and I have been trying to conceive for quite sometime. I was given a <1% chance for natural pregnancy due to Diminished Ovarian Reserve even though I am still at the prime of my reproductive years. We went through fertility treatments but all failed. We were devastated. But prayers kept me strong. All I asked from God was to give me the strength to accept my fate and not to focus on what I don't and can't have. My husband and I started talking about adoption during Holy Week. I was in the phase of acceptance. Life moved on for me.

Due to my upcoming exam and the excitement of starting residency I haven't been paying attention to my monthly visits from Aunt Flo. I looked at my calendar and she was supposed to be due last Thursday. It's now Saturday...I think she got lost. So I casually took a pregnancy test:

As you can see I took 2 tests just to be sure. I was in disbelief. Not in a million years did I think I could get pregnant....This is the greatest miracle God has ever given me :)

Everybody's out!

2010-04-12T08:00:00.002-05:00

The weather this weekend was great! My sister-in-law and I went downtown for some shopping. Almost everybody was wearing shorts and flip-flops!

While driving by the lake we saw people jogging and riding their bikes, totally taking advantage of this short-lived 60+ deg weather.

Shoppers were everywhere! Which of course made traffic really bad. But can you blame them?

Fashion in residency?

2010-04-11T16:20:00.002-05:00

Residents are known to work long hours a day. In my program, residents work an average of 65 hours a week. Some programs would even drive their residents to work 70 hours a week! With this hectic schedule it is but natural for residents to wear the most comfortable clothes possible. I agree. But it doesn't mean that they can't be fashionable either ;)

My goal is to be as comfortable as possible without sacrificing looking good. Two can blend. Why not?

For me pants and blouses with comfortable flat shoes will be my staple outfit. There will be no place for heels in my turf. Not only do I hate wearing heels but I will be on my feet all day long, no way will I even try to balance on heels.

So how do you blend comfort with fashion?

Take for example this simple yet colorful blouse which I got from Forever 21 for only $11.50:

If you pair it with an ordinary black pair of pants it will definitely be very comfortable. But if you add a black simple vest like this:

The outcome would be this:

And of course you can pair the vest with other blouses. Mix and match is the key.

Yesterday my sister-in-law took me shopping as her congratulatory gift for my new job. She's so sweet! First we went to H&M. They had a huge sale going on. I always like their selections. Not too pricey yet the clothes are trendy and durable.

Next we went to The Water Tower Mall and visited several stores from Banana Republic to the Limited.

It was fun to shop but in the end we were both exhausted and called it a day. I am not one to splurge and I only buy things when they are on sale or decently priced...Unless I really really want it...Next on my list: winter outfits and comfortable shoes....

*Pardon the quality of the photos as I was using my phone to take these snaps....

Internship must-haves

2010-04-10T11:41:00.000-05:00

Ok folks I found this awesome website that contains free downloads that are great to help your internship become manageable as possible.

Medfools for IM

Enjoy :)

I hate good-byes

2010-04-04T10:31:00.000-05:00

How do you say good-bye to people you care about?

This has always been my problem. I get too attached to people and when it's time to leave I have a hard time :(

I have decided that June 15 will be my last day at work. People found out and there were a lot of hugging and choked-up tears after that. It made me sad all day....

I still have 2.5 months with them. I will definitely make the most out of these.

Saying good-bye sucks :(

Getting Licensed

2010-04-02T18:48:00.000-05:00

I have begun the process of gathering all requirements to apply for a temporary physician license here in IL back in February. I know that I have a lot of things to fulfill before I can send out the application. I need to fill out the forms, send some forms for my school to sign, send some forms to 2 other hospitals to sign coz I had rotations at these hospitals during clerkship, have my school furnish certificates of affiliation between these hospitals, have an affidavit notarized saying that 2 weeks of my Psychiatric rotations were integrated in other clinical rotations, have the Philippine Regulations Commission sign a form proving I was board certified back home, etc., etc., etc. So I'm really glad I started this process 2 months ago.

Gathering all these documents is not a piece of cake for someone who is thousands of miles away from her medical school. So I created very detailed and specific instructions for my cousin back home to do all the necessary paperwork for me. Poor girl. But I have no choice. And of course it took my school almost 2 months to complete everything.

Finally, all the necessary documents are here. Now all I have to do is mail them out to my program coordinator and she will do the rest. Whew!

I need you

2010-03-30T22:00:00.005-05:00

Take My Hand

Shawn McDonald

Take my hand to the promise land
And on You I want to stand
‘Cause I cannot do it all on my own
You're what I need and I need to be
Right by Your side ‘cause I cannot hide
Lord, I know that I need You

Without You I'm so alone
I am weak but You are strong
You pick me up when I'm falling down
And I am crying
Out to You inside of my heart
I need You, Lord, oh so, for the part
I want You to have my life, Jesus

I fall to my knees
And I'm begging You, please, oh, Lord
Won't You change me
Make me new from the inside out
I want to shout out Your name

I need you

I first heard this song at work and I never thought it was a gospel song until I listened closely to the lyrics. Now, whenever I feel low I listen to this song and it automatically lightens my load :) Enjoy...

My new stet

2010-03-29T17:26:00.000-05:00

On the day I got my match result I was conversing with some of the doctors at work and casually mentioned that I have to buy a new stethoscope coz the rubber on the right ear piece of my old one got torn. And Dr. Gay said, "Don't you worry. We'll get you a new one." I was stunned and got teary-eyed. Not only did these guys write me outstanding recommendation letters now they also want to buy me an awesome new gadget for my new job.

Today my new stethoscope came. I was so excited when they placed a gift-wrapped box on my lap.

It has my initials too ;)

Thanks Dr. Gay and Dr. Sukhani :)

Holy Week

2010-03-27T13:52:00.004-05:00

Holy Week is here....

4 weeks ago I remember having a dilemma in deciding what to give up for lent. For the past 3 years I've always given up sweets and red meat. But this year I wanted to give up something that is part of my daily routine. I decided to give up RICE.

It wasn't hard at first but lately I've been counting the days to when lent would end. Is lent all about giving up "something"? I was completely missing the point. You don't need to give up anything for lent. Lent is all about remembering Jesus Christ's Passion. Was I more prayerful during lent? I mean I went to stations of the cross every Friday. My prayer life has increased but not necessarily because of lent but because of personal reasons. So I guess I haven't really been commemorating Christ's Passion, have I?

Back in the Philippines Holy Week is a huge thing. Filipinos do a whole lot of sacrificing during lent. Some would even go as far as re-enacting Christ's Passion from getting flogged, to carrying the cross, to being crucified. During Holy Thursday and Good Friday stores and other business establishments are closed. And these days are considered national holidays. Some establishments are even closed the whole week. Visita Iglesia commences on Holy Thursday evening and on Friday most parishes hold a procession. Then Easter Sunday comes where all rejoice and eat lechon.

I miss celebrating Holy Week Filipino style.

How to be a good intern...

2010-03-26T11:00:00.006-05:00

Intern Survival Guide by Dr. Mary Yang

http://www.residencyworld.com/thread/31

My dorky glasses

2010-03-24T20:04:00.004-05:00

2 weeks ago I had a nasty corneal ulcer on the nasal aspect of my right eye. I am a chronic contact lens wearer and no matter how hygienic I am I still manage to get recurrent eye infections/irritations for 10 years now.

So my eye doctor put me on Tobradex QID x 2 weeks then taper for the next 2 weeks and the worst part of all- no contact lens for a month or even two!

So now I'm stuck with my dorky glasses until then. Some people look great in them but not me. I look like a complete nerd and I just realized the frame is too wide for my face. I know.... I have no fashion sense.

Oh well....Can't wait to have LASIK done!

It's Here: Democrats Pass Sweeping Health-Care Reform - FOXBusiness.com

2010-03-21T22:07:00.001-05:00

It's Here: Democrats Pass Sweeping Health-Care Reform - FOXBusiness.com

Posted using ShareThis

Is it spring yet?!

2010-03-21T11:01:00.000-05:00

I woke up yesterday morning and saw this. How depressing! But that didn't keep me from celebrating my match result last night.

Can't wait to wear flip flops!

Where did I match????

2010-03-20T11:21:00.001-05:00

Last Thur I found out where I matched. It was not nerve-racking as Monday's result due to the fact that I liked all the programs in my list. It's all in God's hands now where He wants me to be in the next 3 years. My only goal is to be the best physician that I can be.

I was thrilled to learn that I matched at my #1 choice :) And the hospital is only 10 min away from home.

Thanks be to God....

The Last Step

2010-03-16T17:43:00.001-05:00

I have one more exam to complete so I can get rid of the USMLEs: Step 3. This exam is 3x as harder as CK and consists of not 1 but 2 days! The good thing is that most programs don't require you to pass this exam before you start residency unless you need it for visa purposes. So since I have 3 more months before I start residency why not just get this exam out of the way?

First thing you need to do is go to FSMB to register. Still have to do this. You can choose any state you want to register at even if you won't be training in that state. Most IMGs choose CT because this state does not require post-training experiences.

My tactics:

1 month: USMLEWORLD MCQs
1 month: USMLEWORLD CCS
1/2 month: Master The Boards
Maybe: Kaplan CK Lecture Notes

Target exam date: First week of May

I have actually started my prep 2 weeks ago. I have 20% left of the MCQs....Let's see how I fare in the next 2 months :)

My Journal

Did I match????

2010-03-15T21:33:00.000-05:00

At 12 noon EST the result of the match was released. Everybody at the forum was anxiously staring at the clock. I was not nervous until I woke up this morning and realized that in a few hours a new chapter in my life would soon begin. But what if I don't match???? My heart started pounding.

This morning was the longest day of my life! I would look at the clock every 5 minutes and swore that the hand only moved a line. I was losing my mind. I hate the suspense. I can't take it. I pretended to be busy at work yet people kept asking me when I would find out. Leave me alone! I'm nervous here....But of course I just gave them a smile and pretended to be cool. Yeah right! I was turning pale.

Then at precisely 11:50 I opened my email and there it was: From NRMP; Title: Did I Match?

YES!!!!!

I owe everything to God for without Him nothing would be possible.

I decided to apply for the match late in the game with a pending CS score. And along my application process I had problems with my letters of recommendation. The letters where either lost in the mail or in the ERAS pile. Who knows. So I had to request the authors to write me another letter. In the meantime, 75% of the applicants have started receiving invitations for interviews while I was not even half way complete with my requirements. But with God's help I made it through. And no matter what the outcome would've been I am still thankful that I had the opportunity to be a player in the game and emerged a winner :)

Abandon

2010-03-14T17:30:00.000-05:00

I've always been a control freak. I always have a plan for everything. But lately things have not been happening according to my plan. Some say that we are the captain of our ship, but there are instances in our lives that are simply beyond our control. I have learned the hard way. And now it's time to offer my hand to God and let Him lead the way. Lord, I completely surrender myself to you.....

Father,
I abandon myself into your hands; do with me what you will.
Whatever you may do, I thank you:
I am ready for all, I accept all.
Let only your will be done in me, and in all your creatures.
I wish no more than this, O Lord.

Into your hands I commend my soul;
I offer it to you
with all the love of my heart,
for I love you, Lord,
and so need to give myself,
to surrender myself into your hands,
without reserve,
and with boundless confidence,
for you are my Father.

Charles de Foucald

COUNTDOWN

2010-03-12T17:17:00.003-06:00

MATCHED!!!!

Follow the white rabbit....

2010-03-02T13:33:00.002-06:00

Alice in Wonderland has always been my favorite Disney animation movie. I've probably watched it more than a dozen times.There's just something about the dreamy wonderland that gives me a whiff of nostalgia making me forget the aches and pains of the real world.

Lewis Carroll has created magical characters that actually remind me of real people I have encountered in my lifetime. Do I consider myself as an Alice then? Well, I'm not as persistent as she is in chasing that white rabbit down the hole. I think the first thing I would do is call for back-up! But I do have a habit of getting lost along my path, getting distracted by animated characters along the way who are either there to help me or sway me from my goal, and sometimes all I want to do is go home and be safe.

Everyone has a cheshire cat in their lives. Now who is yours? These guys can be your best friends, your protectors, confidantes, or even enemies. I've had them all.

What about the queen? Hmmmm.... I can think of a couple people. These women are power-driven, ruthless, deceitful and authoritative. "Off with their heads!!!!!" I love this scene where Alice finally got to say what the queen deserves! Fast forward to 3:40.

I think my favorite character is the dormouse. All he does is sleep and eat jam! ;) Sometimes I'd like to do that all day....

And now Tim Burton has created a phenomenal version. The movie is actually a combination of Lewis' 2 books (Alice in wonderland and Through the looking glass). And of course having Johnny Depp and Helena Bonham-Carter play key roles in the movie just gives me all the more reason in the world to watch this film. Coming out on March 4th...Can't wait! Watch official trailer

Shrimps with Basil and Cilantro

2010-03-01T18:00:00.003-06:00

My husband's new hobby is to teach me how to cook simple yet exotic dishes. He has been nagging that I have been serving him only instant meals, sandwiches and pizza and not the healthy meals that he thinks he deserves. Hey, I can cook. Just not those complicated dishes. Plus I have no time. I'm always running after the clock....or I'm just simply not interested. I do understand where he is coming from though. I need to learn how to cook healthier meals. Besides, we're planning to start a family soon. What am I going to feed my kids?!

Ok so we started cooking together on Sundays. I was the souz chef as he has more experienced than I am but it was a wonderful experience creating something sumptuous and spending quality time together. It proved to be a romantic project after all.

So, we made this incredible shrimp dish with basil and cilantro. I am not a huge fan of seafood but shrimps I can handle.

The ingredients:

1/2 Kilo shrimps

1 tbsp basil

1 cup cilantro

1 cup spring onions

2 cups of tomatoes

2 cloves of garlic

1 cup of cooking wine

1 tsp red pepper flakes

1/2 tbsp cooking oil

Salt and pepper to taste

Warm the oil in the pan then add the garlic until golden. Add the wine and let it reduce for 5 min

.Then drop the shrimps

Add the basil and spring onions

The tomatoes

Then the cilantro. Add salt and pepper to taste. Stir for about 3-5 min and you're done!

The final product

After 5 min....

Have fun in the kitchen! ;)

ROL

2010-02-24T19:22:00.003-06:00

Tonight is the deadline for the submission of the Rank Order List (ROL). To be exact, 9PM EST. I have certified my ROL on 02/08 and once you do that the status on your ROL page at the NRMP web becomes CERTIFED ROL. Since then I have frequented my NRMP account just to make sure those words did not turn into a different color. Because only "certified" ROL will be used for the match. Yes. I am paranoid, obsessive-compulsive, crazy, you name it. BUT not once did I change my rank order. So that's an accomplisment.

Then comes the agonizing wait until March 15 when the results of the matching comes out. However, I wouldn't even know then where I have been matched. The result merely tells me whether I have been matched or not. Unfilled positions will be released the next day so people who have not been matched can apply to these positions. This is called The Scramble. This can be VERY tricky though because this is a game of who submits their application first. My hubby will be taking that day off from work just in case I need to scramble for dear life. Then on March 18 the real results of the match will be released: which program I have been matched to. This whole match thing can be complicated but I do believe in its integrity. If you really want something you have to go through a whole lot of something too ;)

To be honest, I like all the programs on my list. I would be happy to match with any of them. It took me 9 days to figure out my ROL but I am quite happy with my decision. Let's just hope my #1 program ranked me high enough ;) The program director said he would but....I can't rely on anything at this point but God. It's all up to Him now. I have done my part. And no matter which program I ranked which, at the end of the day, God's will will still prevail.

Good luck to all the players of The Match! This is a very exciting and yet frustrating game ;)

My Chill Station

2010-02-16T19:07:00.007-06:00

I'm a huge fan of chill-out music. I listen to it most of the time throughout the course of the day: driving to work, working out at the gym, doing yoga at home, and lulling myself to sleep on a disturbing night.
I have selected 2 videos that I always watch when I'm in the mood for relaxation and meditation....

CFCF: You Hear Colours

Source: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rzi97vh-lgE

Bliss: Kissing

Source: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YkuvUlA7AcE&feature=related

V-day surprise

2010-02-12T18:11:00.000-06:00

Every year on Valentine's Day I receive a vase of red roses at work. It's always from the same flower shop, always wrapped in the same way and always signed by "Your Secret Admirer."

I know for sure it's from my husband but up to this day he always denies it. He even threatened to skin the man alive when he finds out who he is. Yeah right ;)

Thanks honey! :) I love you....

The KING

2010-02-10T17:35:00.002-06:00

I read my first Stephen King book 20 years ago. My good friend Lea lent me this book called The Drawing Of The Three which is actually the 2nd book of the Dark Tower series. Ever since then I got hooked and wanted to read more and explore his dark imagination. Biography

Over the years I have tried to keep up with him but always found myself out of breath! The guy comes out with a book almost every year. Sometimes more than 1 a year! Not to mention that I had some financial constraints in acquiring the books so I would resort to going to libraries and borrowing from my friends. Luckily though I found some of his books in thrift stores which I snagged automatically. And some of his old books were on sale too so I never let money deprive me of this little pleasure.

Here's the list of the books I read:

IT (and movie)
Cujo (and movie)
Christine (and movie)
Misery (and movie. Kathy Bates was awesome!)
The Eyes Of The Dragon
The Shining (and movie. Jack Nicholson was amazing!)
Night Shift
Thinner (and movie)
Nightmares And Dreamscapes
Needful Things (and movie)
The Tommyknockers (and movie)
Desperation (and movie)
The Regulators
Gerald's Game
Different Seasons
Firestarter
Carrie (and movie)
The Dark Half (and movie)
The Dead Zone (and movie)
The Stand (and movie)
Pet Sematary (and movie)
The Talisman
Skeleton Crew
Four Past Midnight
Insomnia
Dark tower series (The Gunslinger, The Drawing Of The Three, The Wastelands, Wizard and Glass, Song of Susannah, The Dark Tower)
Complete Book List

He also wrote original screenplays for movies and TV series which were not based on his books: Children Of The Corn, The Dream Catcher, Rose Red, Stand By Me, Kingdom Hospital, 1408 and Sleepwalkers. The Shawshank Redemption and The Green Mile are 2 of my favorite movies ever and these were based on his novellas as well. Complete Movie List

One thing funny about Stephen is that he likes doing a cameo appearance on some of his movies. Watch Stephen King's Cameo On Sleepwalker.

Back in college I chose his book, Thinner, for my book report in English. I am proud to say that I left my classmates mesmerized after I presented my report. Got a 96 ;)

Stephen King will never cease to amaze me. He is a genius. His stories can make you laugh, cry, scream in the dark and fall in love. The thing I love about Stephen the most is his great understanding of humanity. He depicts human beings very profoundly making you understand how it is to be truly human and what we are capable of doing and becoming.

I hope Stephen will continue to share his thoughts and imagination for years and years to come. I know I would need a stress reliever from a long day at work. And on a lazy afternoon, what would one want more than curl up on the couch, a book on the right hand and a cup of hot choco on the other?....

To Stephen King: Thank you :)

My thoughts on a boring day at work

2010-02-04T13:29:00.004-06:00

Every day we are faced with situations where we need to make a

decision. It can be a minor thing such as choosing what to wear for

work or what to make for dinner. But there are also instances when we

need to make major decisions which can alter the course of our life's

path. I am in this cross road and I have no idea how to even start

this decision process. I thought I'm the kind of person who knows

exactly what she wants but priorities have changed and my way of

thinking has changed as well. I am at the stage of my life where

everything is no longer about me. I have passed the narcissistic stage

so to speak.

Do the means justify the goals we try to achieve? Should we do

anything to meet our life's dream despite the possibility of

sacrificing the ones we love and the little pleasures in life?

I used to live my life thinking only of the future. I live in the

now so I can have a better future. But lately I've realized that what

and who we are now define our future. Let's not worry too much about the future. The future can take care of itself when it comes.

So I decided to live my life now to the fullest and worry about

tomorrow when tomorrow comes. We absolutely cannot control what

tomorrow will bring. Being a control freak as I am brought me lots of

misery. I worried about the future too much and in the process I tend

to deprive myself of enjoying the moment I am at.

I have a huge decision to make about my future. But since today is a

lovely day I will not be making a decision. I will instead enjoy the

rest of my day doing what I love to do and think about my future

tomorrow. Sounds good.....I'll see you tomorrow ;)

L-O-S-T

2010-02-03T16:54:00.000-06:00

Ok so I am absolutely gaga over this TV show called LOST. I've loved it since day one when it first came out and I was still back home in the Philippines.

Last night was the season premier of its final season. I've been waiting for it to come out for months and I must say it was definitely worth the wait :)

WARNING: Spoilers! If you haven't watched the episode yet please stop reading now.

Mind-boggling points:

*Jacob is dead?! Who is he and how old is he? I know he's been around the island since time immemorial so he's gotta be at least 100, right? And how did he get to the Island? I hope the show will talk more about him coz I definitely wanna know more. There is a sense of serenity about him.

*John Locke is dead so who is the fake one? I gotta say I freaked out when the guys opened the huge box, turned it on its side and the corpse (still not decomposing tho ;) ) of John Locke tumbled out of it! So the fake Locke is basically a copy cat and it's actually really Jacob's eternal-nemesis-with-no-name. Looking back on one of the episodes we see Jacob talking to this mean-looking guy in a black shirt. The guy seemed to harbor a huge animosity towards Jacob and he definitely has a great plan to kill him. And he succeeded. Poor Jacob. And poor Ben! He was used by the fake Locke by poisoning his mind to kill Jacob since he (Jacob's nemesis posing as Locke) cannot do it himself due to some law. So 2 people are now dead: John Locke and Jacob.

*Not poor Juliet! She's sooo sweet! :( Yeah. She's dead too :( After all that rescuing she still died. That sucks! I liked her. Death toll: 3.

*There's another set of "OTHERS"? :-O This new set of "Others"seem to be older (meaning more of a native-looking and ancient) and nicer than Ben's group. But where did they come from? Have they been in the island all this time?

*Sayid: Dead? Not anymore! Death toll for this episode was climbing to 4 but towards the end Sayid was resurrected! Hurray for the new set of "Others"! So these people really do have powers. Well, actually, it was the pool that did it. I'm glad Sayid lived though. He's cute :)

*Other dimension?! So after Juliet detonated the H-bomb the next scene was that of some of our main characters on the Oceanic flight to LAX. Is this some sort of a different dimension?! Because the scenes keep going back and forth between the island and LAX :-/

I found this website that can answer all our endless mind-twisting questions: Lostpedia Yes! Somebody even created a wiki-like website just for LOST. How sweet! ;)

Ahhhhhh! Can't wait for Tue to come! :)

Back to the gym

2010-02-01T17:02:00.000-06:00

I stopped working out 3 months ago. Main reason: I was studying. Secondary reason: I got lazy.

Then I underwent a hormonal treatment for a certain condition. And then the holidays came. Of course you gotta blame it on the holidays. I probably gained 5-7 lbs. Many people said I was too skinny. Maybe I was. My BMI was only 18.4. I guess gaining some weight was not bad after all. But then the bulges formed and I was not happy at all. I need some toning here please!

So I decided to muster some courage to drive to the gym. That was January 5. Still too lazy and unmotivated. This weekend I shopped for a pair of pants which I needed for some fancy occasion. I broke the damn zipper! That's it! It's time.

So today was my first day back at the gym! Hurray! I did the elliptical for 15 min, sit-ups and lifted some weights. After 45 min of working out I felt reborn! Ahhhhh....sweat....muscles will be sore tomorrow...but it feels gooood :)

Plan: M-W-Sat.

Better stick to it or else!

New Saigon

2010-01-27T18:17:00.002-06:00

We found a Vietnamese restaurant that serves not only vey affordable food but absolutely delish as well. It is a small and unassuming family-owned eatery where you can have authentic Vietnamese food. The wife cooks while the husband serves. No other employess but these two humble and very hard-working indivuduals.
New Saigon is located along Broadway and Argyle in northside Chicago. Read the review.

We started off with wanton soup with pork, shrimps, fresh cilantro and mung bean sprouts. The soup itself is seasoned well, the pork and shrimp are tender and tasty. I devoured the whole thing in less than 5 min!

Then came the main event: Marinated Pork chop on steamed rice. It was the best pork chops I've ever had!
The marinade was absolutely divine! I had no idea what they used (cooking is not my forte) but I can definitely taste sugar, a hint of soy sauce...... ah.... The point is that it was the best! I also got fresh lemonade and they weren't lying. It was as fresh as it can get!

The cost:

Wanton soup: $4.75
Pork chop: $4.85
Lemonade: $1.75

I was so stuffed when I got home and was ready to hit the bedroom but decided to google the recipe for this amazing Vietnamese Pork Chop ;) The recipe.

Maybe someday I can make this....Or I can just head to New Saigon whenever I have the craving ;) I think the latter sounds much better.... ;)

The interviews

2010-01-20T11:12:00.004-06:00

The next step in establishing your presence as an IMG in the US health care system is to join the MATCH but before you can do this you need to apply to the program/s of your choice and PRAY that you get as many invitations for interview as possible. ERAS Timeline

I was not planning on applying for the 2010 match as I had concocted a plan to extend our family...but...it proved to be very elusive so I then decided to take plan B: Join the match now.

I started the application process late with a pending Step 2 CS result but in spite of this I was still able to garner 6 interviews, 2 of which are from university hospitals. Another limitation is geography. I prefer to stay in Chicago so I had limited options.

Going for an interview can be a bit nerve-racking, especially the first one. You need to sell yourself in as little as 15 min. First impression is very critical. So shopping for a suit was first on my list. I am not a very trendy person. I value comfort over style. But in this case, style matters most. I found some suits that fit not only my body but also my personality. And for the undershirt: I did not follow the traditional white shirt. I chose my favorite color. Then accessorize with a slick leather portfolio and a black coat since the interview season is always during winter. And of course, the shoes. I hate wearing heels so I chose black leather 2 inch-heel ankle boots for comfort.

Next on my list was to study my CV very carefully and surf the web for common interview questions. Then I formulated my answers to these questions.

My interviews were not as distressing as I thought they would be. The interviewers were very friendly and they asked me questions mostly about my CV. I met the competition and sometimes felt inadequate but during the interview none of these negative emotions surfaced as I was there to prove to them that I was a worthy candidate if not one of the best.

The itinerary for all my interviews was almost clear-cut routine:
*Arrival: 730-745
*Morning report or case presentation: 800-900
*Overview of the program: 900-1000
*Interview: 1000-1130
*Lunch: 1200-1300
*Tour of the facility: 1300-1400

My answers were all very routine as well as most programs asked me the same questions. The interview lasted between 5-15 minutes and the number of interviewers ranged from 1-3. Some programs showed interest and enthusiasm on my application. One even said that if they offered prematches I would definitely be a candidate. Yet others just showed a neutral expression all throughout the interview. Some programs have a cocktail or dinner arrangement that night after or before the interview. And yet there are some that host an annual 2nd look dinner event on a chosen date after all the applicants have been interviewed.

I sent thank you letters 2-3 days after the interview. I know that the norm would be to send the letter at least 1 week after the interview but I wanted the recipient of the letter to remember me and draw a conclusion that I am truly interested in their program.

None of the 6 programs I have an interview at offer prematches so I am definitely at the mercy of the match which can be a perplexing process. I have my last interview on January 22. I will be making my rank order list after that. I pray that God will give me the grace to make the best decision in my ranking order. If I match I will be bound to that program for 3 years so a lot of thinking has to be done. I need to set my priorities straight....

I leave this all up to God now. I have done my part and there is only so much that I can do. So....whatever will be will be ;)

USMLE- how I crushed it!

2010-01-19T20:08:00.005-06:00

Now in order for an International Medical Graduate (IMG) to practice medicine in the US he/she is required to complete a series of examinations and to have his/her medical credentials verified as well by the Educational Commission For Foreign Medical Graduates (ECFMG).
I took some time in making a decision about this matter. I wasn't quite sure whether I would want to practice in the US or go back home. But this is my life now and I started to fall in love with Chicago.

I stumbled into this awesome forum for USMLE takers. It is a place mostly for IMGs where info and tips can be shared, advices can be sought and given and most of all a source of inspiration for many. I have maintained journals all throughout my prep and have met amazing people who helped me tremendously in my quest. I bonded with a bunch of people and are now even friends on FB. Prep4usmle

STEP 1: Basic Sciences

Once I decided on this I sat down and created a time table. I've always been an organizer and this attribute has always been one of my strong points. Since I was working full time, I decided to allot 5 months for this. I then started my research on the best review materials to use. I came up with the following:

Kaplan Step 1 Lecture Notes

First Aid for Step 1

USMLE WORLD Qbank

Webpath for Pathology Slides

BRS Physiology- as supplement

High yield Anatomy- as supplement

Google search and Wikipedia for queries

My schedule was tight but my spirit was very strong. I considered First Aid (FA) to be the most important material along with UWorld. I studied every chance I got- at work, commuting to work (I started taking the train so I could read), even in the john. But of course, I gave myself some R&R: dinner or movie with hubby on the weekends, watching my favorite TV shows after I finish my assigned chapters that night. It was tough, I have to admit, because I only had 3-4 hours to study on weekdays and 8 hours on the weekends and not to mention the contents of the study: Anatomy, Physiology, Biochemistry, Pathology, Pharmacology, Behavioral Science, etc. , who would find these subjects FUN?! Surprisingly, I was able to meet all my "deadline." I was so ready for the exam. I wasn't aiming for a 99 but I was hoping for at least a 90.

My husband and I planned a trip to Mexico as a reward for my hard work. So I took 3 weeks vacation from work: 2 weeks for intensive review and 1 week for MEXICO. On my second day off (12 days before my exam) I received a devastating news: my grammy had passed. It was one of the saddest moments of my life. My grams practically raised me to be who I am today. There was no way I could miss her funeral. I needed to see her for closure. A decision was made. I left for my home country the next day and moved my exam to another week. We also cancelled our Mexico trip. I was away for a week.

When I came back, my jet lag (which I never got over) got worse. I had to waste 3 more days for my clock to wind back to normal. I was getting very anxious about the exam. But I resumed where I had left off and I think the last week of my review saved my leg.

Exam day came, 8 hours long of staring into the computer screen and trying to dig deep inside my brain for the "BEST" answer. And finally it was over...I went home with a huge feeling of relief yet with a gnawing feeling in my stomach that I could have done better. But what's done is done. Now comes the hard part: waiting 2 weeks for the result.

My score: 224/93

STEP 2 Clinical Knowledge (CK): Clinical Sciences

Studying for this exam proved to be sooooo much more easier than the first. I guess it's because I found the subjects more exciting. I spent 4 months and used the following materials:
Kaplan CK Lecture Notes

USMLE WORLD Qbank

Google search and Wikipedia for queries

Yup. That's it.

I spent most of my time on my laptop, trying to get used to answering MCQs.

I thoroughly enjoyed studying for CK. Thankfully, nothing major happened during my prep: no deaths, no work issues, no family conflicts. It was smooth sailing until the day of the exam. I started a journal at this point which helped me stay focused and grounded. A lot of people came to visit and boosted my confidence and made me feel that I was not alone in this journey.

Just as I expected, the exam was very vague. I felt more uncertain of my answers compared to when I was sitting for step 1. All of the choices were correct, I had to choose the BEST answer for that specific scenario. I had to hustle as I only had 60 minutes to answer 46 items most of which are 7-10 lines long. And there were also sequential item sets and matching sets.

After 8 grueling hours, it was over. It was a bitter sweet moment for me. I knew for sure I was going to pass, but as to my score? I had no idea. Another 2 weeks of agonizing uncertainty.

My score: 258/99

STEP 2 Clinical Skills

This exam was......different. Its goal is to prove that future US MDs can speak English, have good interpersonal skills and have a stern clinical eye for subtle cues. And who do we test these skills on? Actors as standardized patients (SP).

In the beginning of my prep I was very unmotivated, even unwilling to waste 2 months of my life to practice on these skills. But it is a requirement and I needed to do what I needed to do. So I complied.

Materials I used:

First Aid For Step 2 CS

USMLE WORLD

Skype

My husband

The cornerstone of my preparation was PRACTICE. I practiced with as many people as I could. I used Skype since most of my partners were from out of town. I also had a live practice with a partner. We practiced twice and we did all the components of the exam: the patient encounter and writing the patient note. We also timed ourselves since we are only given 15 min for the patient encounter and 10 min to write the patient note. In creating your patient note you have the option to type or write. I have the worst handwriting ever so I decided to type which actually proved to be my best option and this decision helped me garner a star (*) on my patient note evaluation.

For most of my physical exam (PE), I practiced on my poor hubby who had no choice but to comply. I didn't do an extensive practice on my PE as this was the least of my concern. The key is to do a "focused" PE. Which means just focus on the system of concern. No need to do a complete PE which is impossible in 15 min since you will be spending most of your time taking the history. And mind you, some of the SPs can be difficult....

The day before my exam I noticed that the rubber on the right ear piece of my stethoscope was torn! I didn't have time to buy a new one.

My good friend Deb came to the rescue. She lent me hers. Thanks Deb!

Exam day came. It was one of the longest day of my life and all throughout the encounters I had a throbbing headache! They did provide breaks and lunch/dinner. Now if you are very picky with food I suggest that you bring your own. If you get my meaning ;)....

We had 12 cases. Thankfully, I was able to finish the encounters with 2-3 min to spare except on 2 cases which were very vague. I heard the end of the encounter announcement as I was about to explain the diagnostic tests but tried to make up on my patient note.

The SPs were very good. They played their roles quite well. I even had one who was empathetic enough to give me more details than I expected an SP to give away without me prying them out of her. Some SPs were uncooperative so it would be up to you to say the right words in coaxing him/her to give you their attention. It can be very tricky. Very tricky indeed...

Finally it was over. I was soooo happy to be done! Did I pass? I hoped so. I did all the things I needed to do: I filled out the differential diagnoses and work-up; I was courteous, reassuring, empathetic, confident and brief on my PE; I asked all relevant and useful questions; etc, etc, etc. So now comes the hard part again. And this time I did not wait for 2 weeks but 12! But to be honest, there were days when I even forgot I still haven't gotten my result. I was preoccupied with other things that came along during the 12-week waiting period. It's either a pass or a fail. No scores, no grades.

My result: PASS with all components on Higher Performance Level.

I finally got my ECFMG Certificate.

I'm done! But not quite....There is still the matter of Step 3 which I did start to study but decided recently to not take it until I find out if I matched or not. Some people take it during their residency which is tempting but I do want this exam out of the way so I may take it sometime in May. I only need a pass. That's it.

In retrospect, I realized that my USMLE journey was not an obstacle along the path of attaining my goal. But it was the first and a very important step in molding me into the best physician that I can be. Knowledge and skills are very important but good values and attitude are very essential as well. This journey was a form of self-discovery. I met a lot of good people along the way. And realized what the things that I truly value in life are.

Chicago

2010-01-19T19:26:00.002-06:00

Chicago is one of the most beautiful cities in the country, if not, the world. It is a very diverse city, for which I am very thankful because not once have I ever felt "different."

At present, Chicago stands out because the current president, B. Obama, hails from Chicago. But before Pres. Obama even took the stage, Chicago has always been well-known for its tourist attractions, outstanding architecture, delicious local cuisine, and of course, the sports teams: Cubs, White Sox, Bears, Blackhawks and Bulls.

But most of all, the reason why I love Chicago is because of its people. I've met so many good people in this beautiful city and I must say, I can see myself growing old here ;)

Introducing....

2010-01-19T18:56:00.000-06:00

I'm a native of the Philippines, a tropical country in South-East Asia but decided to leave my simple life to dive into an intricate one here in Chicago. Of course, my primary reason was....L-O-V-E.

I've never been to the US before so I was filled with excitement yet with a hint of apprehension. What lie/s ahead of me? Hopefully a family of 2 kids (1 of each sex, pls?), a successful medical practice, opportunities for medical missionary, active involvement in church, and the chance to see the world (which as of now, I have only seen 5% of). They may not occur in this order or may not even occur AT ALL but I've always been an optimistic person and I believe that God has already laid out our fate and all we have to do is choose the right path to take towards our destination.